Ode to a middle-aged woman

Growing old gracefully

Middle age ain’t what it used to be. A healthier lifestyle, a range of clothes, styles and gadgets, today’s middle aged don’t appear to be just that. Middle aged….

I’m middle aged. When I think about it it strikes me with horror! 43! That’s like way old 😉 Then I look at me and, not in a big headed way but, I certainly don’t strike myself as what I pictured someone in their 40’s to be like, so what does that say about me? Am I not growing old gracefully or more likely that we’ve become younger or more in tune with the generations beneath us. I’m not saying all people my age are young at heart, but we all know people who are “old before their time” so maybe it’s what your own heart is like?

I dye my hair, not because I’ve got grey hairs (thx moms genes) but because I can. I love to ring the changes. I’ve been white blonde to blue black, with all the shades of browns and reds in between. I’ve had a day where I was blonde that a.m. Purple at lunchtime, changed my mind. Sported peach for a worrying afternoon and finally settled on pillar box red that teatime. Thankfully it didn’t fall out. Also thankfully I’ve a very tolerant husband ;D

I’ve had my hair brethren style to my waist to a skinhead. I’ve also sported all styles in between and have just gone back to a pixie cut that I’ve dyed black. I’m not afraid to mess about with my hair, another sign that I’ve either grown up or not at all? Would I go grey gracefully, I’m not sure. Certainly my husband has spatterings of grey through his black hair and he looks distinguished. I think as women we don’t feel equally as “distinguished” and yet I’ve seen the most beautiful of woman sporting naturally grey hair, so I just don’t know. My moms never dyed her hair. Her hair went from conker brown to a mouse coloured. She has grey at her temples. That’s it. She’s 76!!! (I say again thx moms genes)

Weight as a teen and 20’s always seemed to be an issue, but as I reflect, I think it was more an issue in my head rather than a reality. I was never a skinny Minnie but nor was I as huge as my tent tshirts tried to hide!! As I’ve grown older, I’ve embraced the fact that I’ve curves and that curves doesn’t equate to fat. I go in and out in all the correct places. I’ve a bum, curvy thighs, a tummy that’s oh so not flat, boobs that hmmmm may have seen better days but hey, still got them ;). Do I have “bad days”, of course I do, but not in the crippling I can’t be seen dead outside type days. I realise I’m me and that’s just right. Yes I’d like to be more toned, but obviously not enough or I would put in more effort haha. But I do enjoy healthy eating and exercise but as a life choice, not as a pressure to what society thinks is today’s “perfect”. Yes another part of growing old gracefully is learning acceptance of ones self.

I’ve never been shy, but I’m certainly more confident than I was. Confidence in myself, my opinions, when to talk and when to listen. I’ve also learnt that hanging about with all ages helps me learn and grow as a person. I’m fortunate to have a range of friends who love me for me, we have a give and take relationship. I’ve only a couple of confidantes; part of growing old gracefully has seen me trust less people, or maybe I’ve become more astute as to who I can actually trust. Personally I’ve started to gather some female friends around me. I tended, as I grew up, to get on better with boys than girls as I was a Tom-boy and the rough and tumble was more appealing. As I’ve got older I’ve got more and more girly. I’m enjoying this side of me and am starting to appreciate girlfriends more. I’ll never be a high maintenance girl but I do take care of me.

I adore fashion, I still don my converse one day with a pair of faded jeans, a white shirt and suit jacket; the next day I could be sporting a flirty fit and flare dress and a pair of Mary Janes. Another day skinny jeans and a tee with scraper heels. I dress for me…. another sign that it’s ok to be me, a classic growing up gracefully with a 2012 twist. Fashion is personal rather than completely governed by age.  I do wear stuff that my teen daughters lust over and pinch. So “cool mom with fabulous taste” is how I like to think of my self rather than mutton dressed as lamb.

Technology and embracing it does separate people. Tutting at the latest new fangled phone or tablet rather than queuing for said new toy does make a difference to how you age. Being in tune with social networking, music, programmes etc brings the generations closer. Again it’s down to personal choice and I don’t proclaim to adore everything my kids like, there has to be your own generation stuff, but certainly there are enough commans to make the generational gap smaller. Am I rebelling against what I should be doing or has the decades created a different middle-aged persona?

So do you think you are growing up gracefully? What would you do to change yourself as you get older? Do you view 43 as old? As always answers on a postcard (the modern type ie comments box below)

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Mini Waffler
About Mini Waffler 100 Articles
Northern Irish; Married with three mini adults sharing the nest...... nurse (alzheimers, dementia and palliative care) Loves to read, word games and movie nights. Enjoys gardening,walking and jogging. Adore swimming. Favourite day-Wednesday Favourite colour-purple " would like to meet "...... Haha thought my profile was application to dating site *snigger* weird sense of humour ;)