Last-Gen is Dead, long live Last-Gen!

Last-gen

What should I buy, what should I buy? A PS4? An Xbox One? Well, I guess the last one won’t be an option for a while, since they won’t ship until March next year here in the Netherlands..

But seriously, what SHOULD I BUY?! A Wii U maybe? There are some awesome underrated releases going on over there right now. Maybe stick to PC gaming from now on? But the Xbox 360 was so good… If only somebody could help me out of this nagging doubt.

A pleasure to make your acquaintance

Unknown voice: “Hello there!” “Wait… You look familiar.”

Now Me 7

Me: “Hiya! Erm.. Well.. That might be because you are me. “

Last-gen Me

Last-gen Me: “You must be kidding, right?” “How did that even happen?”

Now Me 10

“I have no idea dude, I’m no scientist, I just go to university as a Liberal Arts student.”

Last-gen Me

“Wait… You’re saying I’m spending 6 years in high school to end up as a Liberal Arts student?!
And I was already getting sick of this third year…”

Now Me 4

“What’s wrong with doing Liberal Arts?”

Last-gen Me

“Job opportunities for example? Oh god.. I might as well go and play a shit-ton of video games right now.”

Now Me 2

“Believe me, you would have done that anyways.”

Last-gen Me

“…”

Next-gen vs. Last-gen

Now Me 6

“Now that you’re here, we might as well talk a bit about video games! Because I know you’re already starting to get into it…”

Last-gen Me

“Yeah well… I guess. I did beat Gears of War a lot of times. Saints Row is pretty awesome as well. But the money man! I want more games!”

Now Me 2

“Don’t you worry about the money.. You’ll get plenty of games later, but you’re going to play a lot less.”

Last-gen Me

“Wait what? That doesn’t make any sense!”

Now Me 1

“Well, that’s called growing up I’m afraid. A trade-off, if you will. You’ll be making money, but having less time, my friend.”

Last-gen Me

“That sucks, dude.”

Now Me 6

“Well, at least you’ll have a couple of years where you will kick ass at Halo 3.”

Last-gen Me

“Halo 3! I am soooo looking forward to that. But… kick ass? Does that mean I’m getting Xbox Live?”

Now Me 10

“Dude, I know you’re looking into that right now. Stop pretending, already.”

Last-gen Me

“…”

Now Me 3

“Anyways, like I said, video games. There’s something I’ve been wondering. Do you remember when you first got your Xbox 360? You bought it together with Gears of War and Saints Row, right? How did you feel when you jumped from the old Xbox to an Xbox 360?”

Last-gen Me

“Dude, that was awesome… Those graphics man. Gears of War really got to me, with even a scary story of some sorts. You really get the gritty and dirty feeling. They called it ‘Destroyed Beauty’. Cliff Bleszinski kicks ass when it comes to atmosphere. And Saints Row man! Finally a game which can challenge GTA’s hegemony with pride! It’s sooo much fun!”

Now Me 5

“I remember that yeah…Too bad Cliffy left Epic, Gears of War became a commercial Call of Duty whore and THQ went bankrupt. Pardon my French.”

Last-gen Me

“Cliffy left and THQ bankrupt? Ah man… But Call of Duty whore? Like ripping it off? Why would they do that? Call of Duty isn’t that popular right?”

Now Me 3

*Laughs* “Just you wait and see, mister. And yeah, Cliffy is doing his own thing now. THQ is suing YouTubers with Google’s retarded new Content ID policy over games they don’t even own anymore. But you’ll experience that for yourself later. Back to my point: you’re kind of proving it.

Last-gen Me

“What is that?”

Now Me 8

“I feel the launch of the PS4 and Xbox One – yes that’s the name of Microsoft’s next console – were cold. They didn’t have the ‘oooohs’ and ‘aaaaaahs’ I remembered from your generation. The Xbox 360 jumping in as the very first next-gen console and Xbox Live blooming as a great online network. Against all odds, the Nintendo Wii becoming the best-selling console of the generation. The PS3 lagging horribly behind, and eventually catching up because of awesome games and a ridiculous fuck-up from Microsoft with their Red Ring of Death.”

Last-gen Me

“You’re saying the Nintendo Wii will become the dominant console? Get out of here. Who’s going to play that? Elder people, women, small children?”

Now Me 3

*laughs even harder* “Just you wait and see, friend. Just you wait and see…”

But… Dem graphics! Voice commands! Kinect! TV TV TV!

Last-gen Me

“I think I get what you’re saying, but aren’t you too harsh on your new generation? I mean they’re just starting. The Xbox 360 didn’t have too many awesome titles at first.”

Now Me 7

“Yeah, I guess… Maybe I’ll turn my opinion around after a while. I remember being sceptical about the PS3 as well.”

Last-gen Me

“Oh, but that thing sucks man! Believe me… Ridiculously overpriced with 0 original games!”

Now Me 3

“Yeah, I’ll see you in a while after the release of Uncharted 1/2/3, Journey, The Last of Us, Killzone 2 and 3 and LittleBigPlanet. Whatever the case, it feels the graphical jump is so unnoticable…Maybe Moore’s Law has something to do with it?

Most launch games were simple ports. The biggest selling point of the Xbox One is the integrated Kinect, as well as multimedia functions which will probably never arrive in the Netherlands. The PS4 makes a lot “for the gamer” promises to get a more positive market position, whilst simultaneously only shortly mentioning the fact that online play will cost money now and capturing footage from their consoles for derivative works is nearly impossible. And don’t get me started about their DRM lies.

Last-gen Me

“Moore’s Law? Kinect? DRM? What’s that, a new awesome, revolutionary function in video games?”

Now Me 5

“I wish it was something like that, brother. Don’t you worry about it for now.”

Last-gen Me

“I think you should give it some time, man. I had a sneak peak at some info on your laptop and I see a million pre-orders for both consoles. With such numbers, they have to create stuff that’s appealing, right?”

Now Me 4

“I guess, yeah..”

Last-gen Me

“What’s with that Wii U, btw? It’s selling really poorly from the looks of it. And you said the Wii will turn out a success?”

Now Me 5

“Yeah, the Wii U is a whole other story I’m afraid..”

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Pieter
About Pieter 21 Articles
20-year-old Dutchie; passion for music and video games; Co-Creator of OtterAndWeasel; // YouTube: www.youtube.com/otterandweasel // Twitter: @Pjotterdeotter @OtterAndWeasel // Facebook: www.facebook.com/otterandweasel