For those of you who may not be aware, and that is quite possibly the vast majority, part of my job involves checking letters to ensure the grammar and spelling is correct. I imagine that the powers that be decided that my random scribblings qualifies me as some kind of guru on the matter. I would dispute that but who am I to argue with a big cheese?
Anyway, I digress, I need to check the letters to ensure that all rules of spelling and grammar are adhered to whilst ignoring that most important of English grammar rules and that is this wonderful Ian’s evolving language of ours has no real set rules as such.
Grammar is always changing, what seems to be set in stone today may not necessarily be so in the future.
It’s all rather embarrassing telling people that there is comma missing here or a semi-colon missing there when all I really want to do is pull people up over a word I despise over every other word in the English language, banter.
This word will never appear in the kind of letters that I audit, or at least it shouldn’t, but the very thought of it sends shivers down my spine. It is used by the kind of people who claim to crazy ( “with a capital K” at times). “We had such great banter last night, the jokes were flying”. Yes, I am so jealous, how I wish I was there with you and your friends with all your banter. Is it just me where the phrase “we had great banter” sends shivers down my spine? Surely it cannot be. It doesn’t end there either. Football has got in on he act when football fans are praised at football matches for “exchanging great banter”. Well, I have news for you folks on that score. They are abusing each other. That’s what football fans do. Trust me, Man United and City will not be spending ninety minutes exchanging jokes and pleasantries.
All this is before I’ve even started on the bullies who use the word a feeble way of disguising their abuse as they call somebody names and when the object of their derision objects the bully responds with that standard response of the bantering imbecile “What’s the matter with you? It’s only banter!” As if that excuses their behaviour like some standard get out clause in the manner of the get out of jail free card in Monopoly
I realise this article is rather rants and probably doesn’t flow very well but I have a very good reason for this and hat is while I have been typing this little thing I have had that terrible word going round and round and round in my head. Not just the word but they way they pronounce it. People don’t just say banter. They say “ban-oh”. Ugh! Just ugh! Ban-oh. It doesn’t sound right on any level whatsoever. Use another word, please, I beseech you. Just say you had a good time last night down the pub, just say the football fans created a great atmosphere, admit your joke at somebody’s expense crossed the boundary.
If you cannot do that or disagree with the above then I am sorry after all it is just banter.
