I use my personal blog daftbrush.tumblr.com to vent, analyse and reflect where I’m going in life. At times readers comment or react to a piece of writing, especially when I write something that surprises them. One particular blog was me struggling with my confidence and trying hard to make a change. I was obviously holding myself back but I didn’t quite know how to make the next move. Cue dipping lower into the murk and putting up with what I was used too. Plus throwing out the odd moaning tweet or five and the “it’s not my fault I blame the world chip that sat on my shoulder ”
Then I received a present from Amazon. (actually my sister but I didn’t know that) Whooooo. Cue excitement until I opened it and saw what I felt were self help books. They were!! Conflicting thoughts went through my head. “Oh wow, someone cares and feels I need these books” And “oh wow am I that ‘sad’ that I need these books” There it is in a nutshell, the stereotypical reaction to self help books, that are, in reality, counselling without the person and the couch. I hated to admit it, but maybe I DID need these books, even if it was to tell me what I already knew. So I decided to read.
As the book says, “straight talking guide to succeeding in life” I read common sense stuff I did actually know. I’d played the ‘woe is me’ victim card for so long, I was happy moaning about wanting change rather than actually changing. I see it daily on social network sites and roll my eyes at such statuses and tweets and yet I was doing exactly the same.
It is actually easier to wear a “victim T-shirt” than pull it off and face your fear, confront the issue and deal with it. BUT if you really want to change something, big or small. Just shut-up and do it. Stop telling others, just get on with it. Harsh but true. Actions speak louder than words. Cliche after cliche came into my head. Common sense dictated and I grabbed myself by the shoulders, shook myself a bit and without telling a soul decided to Shut up and move on.
Since making that decision I’ve shirked off several t-shirts in regards to me, friendships, my job, my family life and my interactions on and off-line. It’s been a huge process and I’m not done yet. It’s been very therapeutic not to moan, but to do. I’ve shared very little re all the changes except that I have made changes. I’m learning to knock negativity on the head. Now I’m not perfect, far from it and I’m still hugging closely some t-shirts. I even pulled some back on. Ever the victim!! Haha, but I will give them up.
I consider my self generally a confident person and yet this book helped me immensely. Whilst reading through the chapters, I nodded a lot and even found myself sharing my newfound pearls of wisdom with others. I’m such a “guru” haha
But in all seriousness, I’ve learnt stuff, I’ve reminded myself of who I am, where I want to go and who I want to be. I’m sharing my experiences so others can also benefit. I’m less afraid of making mistakes and failing, because that’s part of getting where I’m going. I’m allowing myself to be put in harm’s way and facing challenges head on. I’ve also learnt that I need to listen to myself and make the right decisions for me. Not for others. For me. Common sense once again. Rather than sticking my head in the sand or blaming others for my failings, I’m accepting responsibility myself for my actions/reactions. I’m growing up! It’s easy to blame others or situations as to why things aren’t going the way you want it to. I’ve realised if I want change, I’m not to waste it moaning about it, but to get on with it and change it, that, or shut up about it and wear the damn victim t-shirt quietly!!!
I can be harsh as I’m talking about me. But maybe it might trigger thoughts of your own. Maybe, just maybe you are tired of being the victim. Maybe you didn’t even realise you were playing the victim, I didn’t!! Or maybe you’ve already got it sussed 😀
So to all you people out there……You want change??
Whether weight, how you view yourself, your job, your friends, how you live your life….. If you aren’t happy and want to make it different, maybe S.U.M.O is the book to help you realise your personal goals. I thoroughly enjoyed and appreciated the learning curve it gave me. I also found the courage to address some issues and now have made some substantial changes in my life. All positive 😀
I’ve no regrets and have a different perspective now. It’s been a positive but tough experience. It has also made me realise that there’s room for self help books on my bookshelf too. I hope this review helps.
soapgirl
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