As Mother’s Day fast approaches this Sunday, Tommy’s, a leading UK pregnancy charity, revealed 59% of mums concealed their pregnancy from their own mums. The YouGov survey of over 2,000 Brits has revealed insights into often unspoken struggles surrounding pregnancy and loss.
One of the key findings from this survey revealed that a surprising 59% of mums kept their pregnancy secret from their own mum. The reasons behind this included feelings of ‘embarrassment’, it being ‘too personal’ and ‘not having that type of relationship with their mum’ as the top reasons for keeping the journey a secret.
The survey is a part of Tommy’s wider Mother’s Day campaign, #WeSeeAMum, which aims to recognise all mums, wherever they are on their pregnancy journey, and aims to encourage people to talk more openly about different paths to parenthood.
Amanda Holden and Myleene Klass are among some of the celebrities backing the launch of this campaign, and with more than half of mums feeling sad in the run-up to Mother’s Day and more than a quarter feeling anxious or overwhelmed, this year’s campaign focuses on sharing messages of support with others who might find this time difficult ahead of Mother’s Day.
The results revealed some key findings including:
- 97% of those surveyed want to raise awareness about the challenges of Mother’s Day.
- 40% of UK adults agreed that we should talk more about people’s different experiences of becoming a parent.
- 39% of mums express happiness when thinking about Mother’s Day.
- 30% of mums find Mother’s Day too commercial.
- 12% of mums find the day difficult as there are too many expectations
Amanda said “In the middle of the night at the height of my grief of giving birth to my still born son Theo, I sadly found no comfort online. Blinded by tears most websites were convoluted and technically difficult to access. Especially to a person not thinking straight – desperate and fumbling for words or stories similar to her own.
“I was fortunate in that my midwife friend was a grief counsellor in the hospital Theo was born so I had her on hand for all my questions…how did it happen? Why? Why me? Was it my fault?
“That’s why I fully support Tommy’s We See A Mum campaign. It is imperative to be there for each other. To love and support and most importantly talk about the loss of our children. At any stage it is difficult, distressing and utterly heart–breaking. The strength a family need to continue on the journey of trying again knowing it may happen again or worrying it might is a huge undertaking. We See A Mum. We’ve got you. Keep talking. Never give up. This Mother’s Day I will be with my two beautiful daughters, I am a mum of three though, I always remember my beautiful son Theo. I am always very grateful, it’s the one day where I count my blessings and think of others. So whatever journey you are on, my thoughts are with you.”
Myleene said: “When you’ve been through the pain of miscarriage and baby loss, it’s such an isolating time. You are very much in limbo as you’re not the person you were nor are you the person you hoped you’d be. That’s why the words, ‘We see a mum’ are so important. You might not have your baby in your arms, but you hold them in your heart every day. The acknowledgment you are not alone in this is a great comfort.”
Kath Abrahams, Tommy’s Chief Executive added:
“We’re immensely grateful to Amanda, Myleene and Georgia for speaking so honestly about their own experiences of pregnancy loss in support of our We See A Mum campaign.
“As they understand so well, Mother’s Day can be an emotional time. At Tommy’s, we know that every experience of motherhood is unique, and what it means to be a mum is different for everybody. Many people will feel like parents from the moment they start their IVF journey, or when they see a positive pregnancy test – even if, heartbreakingly, their much-wanted pregnancy ends in loss. Here at Tommy’s, we’re coming together with our community on Mother’s Day 2024 to recognise and celebrate every mum, no matter what their journey.”
Readers can find more about the #WeSeeAMum campaign and how to support here.
