Young children ask so many “why” questions it seems like they think adults know everything. If only that were true. Unfortunately, as a parent, you might feel just as lost when it comes to raising your kids. We’re all bound to make a few mistakes in the learning process, but here’s a few you should always avoid.
1. Forgetting you’re the boss
Parenting involves tackling daily manipulation, begging, crying, tantrums, pleading, and many more obstacles that can make you forget that you’re actually in charge. To teach your child healthy habits and instill a good sense of discipline, don’t give into your children by buying them candy, so they don’t cry at the store or let them dictate your schedule or eat only the food they like, which often is also bad for them, anyway.
2. Consequences are washy washy
Many parents make empty threats. “If you don’t clean your room you can’t watch TV” sounds reasonable. The problem? Many parents don’t follow through all the time, and for consequences to work, they need to be consistent. Your children won’t take your threats seriously and will come to think you’re not serious if you don’t set consistent consequences. Pretty soon, your kids will think they can get away with anything.
3. You don’t do what you say
Children learn by example. If your actions don’t follow what you’re preaching, there will be an obvious disconnect. If you want your children to eat healthy, you need to, too. If you want them to stop watching so much TV, get off their phones, and get back out to play in nature a bit, then you probably shouldn’t be sitting with the seat reclined and the remote in your hand. You need to lead by example because words aren’t reality until you put them into actions.
4. You don’t take your children seriously
Drama is the key marker of your children’s early and adolescent lives. Their problems might seem minuscule to you when you compare it the big picture, but that doesn’t mean their emotions aren’t real. Certainly help your child break outside their bubble, but don’t belittle their feelings and brush them aside. You might miss a real problem, an opportunity to bond and coach your child. Channel your younger self, listen to your children earnestly, and acknowledge their reality.
5. You think your child can’t do wrong
When your baby is born, you can’t help but think how perfect they are – they are so special, so wonderful, and you’re so full of love for that adorable little human. There is perfection in every child, but don’t let your love cloud you from the fact that even though your child is perfect to you, they can still make mistakes and do things you wouldn’t necessarily expect. If a teacher talks to you about an issue at school or another parent mentions some behavior issues at a party, don’t automatically blame the messenger. Obviously, you want to trust your children, but keep in mind they aren’t saints, either. Don’t make the mistake of thinking your child is always the victim. You may need to do some digging to get to the bottom of the issue.
6. You live only for your children
If you are actively involved in your child’s life, you’re on the right track. However, sometimes involvement can quickly turn into a near obsession, where you find your life revolving around your children and their activities at the expense of your hobbies, development, and free time. Even though you want to spend as much time as you can with your child and be supportive, sometimes showing your child how to be independent and pursue what’s best for oneself is the best way to support them. You want your child to become a whole, well-rounded person, so make sure you’re doing the same for yourself.
7. You try to craft the child you want to have
When you found out you were going to have a baby, you may have dreamed about your child becoming a doctor, musician, football player; you name it. Since you had such big dreams, you might accidentally push your child down one path, when their desires are calling them toward another. Don’t force your child into anything, let them craft and discover themselves.
Being a parent is never easy, but knowing some of the most common parenting stakes beforehand can help you avoid them.
References
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/10-common-mistakes-parents-today-make-me-included_b_4753451.html
http://www.bestofparenting.com/7-most-common-mistakes-parents-make/
Author Bio
Meighan Sembrano has done her Mass Communication degree. In her free time, she likes to write about Health, Lifestyle Fitness, Glozine world news and Beauty. She is an author at Consumer Health Digest since 2012. To know more about her, follow her on Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest.